This topic just popped into my mind while writing to twitter and I thought i'd share this one here.
I've received some feedback from time to time that I'm not an easy person to approach. I know I may have that "I will kill you" -face on when I'm on town an usually it's because I just don't even like hanging out on town without no reason. Well anyway there's also been some talk that some people can't imagine me even smiling. I can relate to this cause I'm kinda always avoiding cameras when in parties but when I just can't avoid I put on a serious face; always. It's kinda easier I think. It just doesn't come naturally to me; smile I mean. I've never learned to smile in pictures but I've been trying to take more "not so angry" pics from time to time, and I even think that I have some in my Instagram. Few, but still some.
I might appear as rude if you meet me the first time cause I kinda have a tendency to keep my distance at first but then when I get to know you it's different, I let go. I do smile and laugh a lot but that's behind the scenes, with friends etc. There's no camera to capture that so I guess it's kinda natural that I appear bored, angry or anything a long those lines when judged from the distance. And if you judge me by my online behavior then it's just... well.. lost cause :'D Let's just say that I say everything quite straight. What I feel, what I'm thinking about something etc. So because I'm being that kind of "honest", it might struck as rude to some people. well it's not; I'm just being honest and telling what I think about something because I think there's no need to lie. Why lie to gain popularity? Just be you, and be honest. I think that's more better way to live. And most important, be honest to yourself. And also I appreciate people who can be honest and have their own opinions.
"I want to live by the idea that there's some good in everyone, but there are times I find that increasingly difficult to believe." -K
My friend tweeted that and it kinda resembles my ideas so I thought sharing that. I don't want to judge people when I don't know them because I know I can mislead people thinking that I have a cold heart. Well that's not the case; if you are close to me and I care about you, I'll do almost anything for you. And sometimes that's even taking me down with people cause I always like to help others because I have no idea how to help myself. But sometimes it's hard to live with that kind of thinking because there are times it's almost impossible to find anything good in someone. I've faced that kind of situation "lately". But I've also noticed that I have a extremely forgiving heart. If someone is really ready to apologize me sincerely when they have done something "bad" to me, I just can't be angry or frustrated anymore.
This is not an angst -post so let's not go there now. I got kinda side tracked there for a moment but the main thing in this post is that I wanted to analyze myself and how I might appear to strangers that don't know me. Maybe this helps me to process how I act when I meet new people. I really don't even know but this is just based on what some people have said and what I feel.
And this is the exact thing I meant that there might be times when I have something longer in my mind that doesn't quite fit in facebook or twitter; this is one of those moments i guess.
And here's a pic of me wearing a wig few days ago.
Also some other news. I'm quite active tumblr browser and it's actually rare that I come across something that I really think is really cute or super awesome. I want to share this piece of art with the source to original poster. Still not sure who actually did the art but I think this is just simple, beautiful and really cute.
PS. updated and added something to the txt around 08:16pm. 10/01/2013
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